Year End

As the year winds down, we all face our goodbyes.
Our farewell to positions, partners, and friendships
We bid adieu to the people who no longer fit into our lives
The clothes that we no longer fit into
The projects we agree to abandon, because the spark is gone.

And into that space
Hopefully
We will welcome what will be
Because we are no longer who we were
when the year began, during or yesterday.

Each day, with each decision
We have chosen to be a new Person
And time has allowed each of us to unfold
To acknowledge and give us the courage
To embrace
Not just the new 365 upon us
But the new opportunities, that lie today
In the shadows, that will emerge
In the headlights of each choice we make.

Today I am Brave Enough

Several months ago, I wrote the piece below. It is accurate. It has taken months for me to be able to open my heart and share this. I write today to give thanks to all those who surrounded my daughter and myself, who comforted and held us up in thought and prayer and whispered in our ears when we needed it most.

We celebrated an early Christmas present this year, my child is 6 months cancer-free. I thank all of you who stood beside us through this journey, and did not retreat because of your own fears.

April 19th
Today I became the Mom of a child with cancer
Today my child faced her mortality
with the few words spoken by a family doctor
Today my child cried in fear
Today I cannot cry
I wrap myself in a shawl of solitude
I speak quietly, I pray for courage
I am in slow motion, in drowning waters
I plan, then I pray some more.

Today I will remember forever
Then Day 1 will be done
and Tomorrow will be different.